Moments of Grace

February 27, 2024

Rose Tobin

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When the teacher Caroline Myss asked her audience to describe how moments of service and Grace had affected them, one man told her this story. He had been in a very dark place in his life, to the point where he was actively contemplating suicide. On his way home to end his life, his main concern was whether to take an overdose or slit his wrists. Did he have enough pills? Would the razor be sharp enough? He came to a crossroads with a Stop sign, and stood on the street corner. A woman stopped her car and waved at him to let him cross.

There was something about her smile, her simple kindness and warmth that touched him so deeply that it reached into the abyss of his despair. That one Moment of Grace was enough to be a turning point in his life. Maybe life was worth living after all. Maybe he had something to live for.

He has never forgotten that moment. On the other hand, it’s more than likely that she didn’t give it a second thought. It was probably one of countless Moments of Grace and kindness which flowed so naturally from her that she wasn’t even aware of them.

Ripple Effects of Moments of Grace

If you’re interested in reading a post like this, you’re more than likely committed to being of service. I imagine that you want your life to be meaningful and to have a positive impact on the world and people around you.

What if, like the woman in this story, some of your greatest gifts to the world have not occurred when you were making an effort to be helpful or to “make a difference?” Like this woman, you may not even be aware of the ripple effects of a totally spontaneous word or smile of yours that occurred years ago. Moments of Grace that expanded into infinity.

It is of course fine to want to have an impact. That’s not the issue here. But it’s also very easy to become attached to seeing results or wanting to give ourselves credit for helping others.

And I sometimes wonder how often I have benefited from other people’s Moments of Grace. More than I can possibly imagine, I imagine.

Moments of Impersonal Grace

What the story above symbolises for me is the power of Grace that emanates naturally when we develop our capacity for love, compassion and kindness. Grace gives these qualities an almost impersonal quality, in the best sense. It’s like we are depositing Moments of Grace into a cosmic bank account where it becomes available to wherever it is most needed.

Grace is one of those qualities which we can feel intuitively but may not be able to define precisely.

As Mary Oliver wrote: “You can have the other words – chance, luck, coincidence, serendipity. I’ll take grace. I don’t know what is is, exactly, but I’ll take it.”

Or as William Hazlitt expressed it: “Grace has been defined as the outward expression of the inward harmony of the soul.”

Grace is an aspect of unconditional love. Graciousness also implies a generosity which is not merely material generosity. Generosity of spirit is the willingness to express thanks or acknowledge the importance of others in our lives. Such Grace is associated with modesty and humility.

The Grace of God or Source

We often speak of Grace in the context of the Grace of God. Even if we don’t use the word “God”, or are not even sure if we believe in God or Source, many of us instinctively sense the sacredness of Grace.

Traditional spiritual systems see the Grace of God as a gift that is bestowed on us. It isn’t something we can force or make happen, or bargain with God to receive. In the best sense, it is mysterious and fluid.

This reminds me of Shakespeare’s lines on the quality of mercy:

“It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven
Upon the place beneath.” (Merchant of Venice)

Grace flows from God or Source to us. And, through Moments of Grace, it can also flow through us to others.

Similar to St Francis’s prayer: “Make me a channel of Your Peace“, we can ask “Make me a channel of Your Grace.”

Ultimately, being a channel of Peace, or Love, or Grace, is about the same essence. But different concepts or flavours of the sacred can touch us at different stages of our lives. Let us choose whatever expression resonates most truly for us.

Moments of Graceful Ease

Recognizing that Grace is not something that emanates from us so much as it comes through us actually takes us off the hook, in the sense that we don’t have to try so hard. In the best sense, we aren’t in charge of the outcome.

With St Francis, we can intend or pray, “Let me be a channel of Grace in this situation” or “Let Grace express itself through me wherever I go today.”

We can trust the gentle power of Grace itself to flow in the most beneficial way for all concerned.

Such Grace may express itself gently and sweetly. But it may also express strongly and firmly. For example we may need to establish boundaries in the face of aggressive or inappropriate behavior. If our boundary-setting is founded in Grace, which implies respect for the intrinsic worth of the other person, this can also be a valuable learning experience for them. Think of the Grace of Martin Luther King at Selma.

Reflections

Am I bringing Grace to this situation, or withholding it?

How much have I been blessed by other people’s Grace? Let me be willing to appreciate the countless lifeforms which have blessed me in ways I can hardly imagine.

Can I be humble enough to allow Life to unfold as it does regardless of whether I approve of it or whether it suits me?

Can I have the Grace not to hold others or myself prisoner to past errors or perceived slights?

May I be alert today to Moments of Grace as I go about my day. It’s not about the size of a gesture but the quality of love, kindness, compassion and joy that inspires them.

Moments of Grace and Namaste

Grace is an aspect and expression of the purest love, of the spirit of Namaste (the sacred in me acknowledges the sacred in you).

Let our lives grow in Grace, and let us recognise the Moments of Grace that have blessed us even when we were blind to them.

Let our lives be lived in a true state of Grace.